Do Your Friends/family Come To Your Shows?

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

women at our gigs actually put on MORE clothes after we play...

 

[NateSLC]

My wife and I are in a band together so we have a ton of family and friends. As a band rule though while we appreciate when they do come to shows equally as much as we appreciate anybody coming to shows we do not focus on family and friends at all. For us a stranger is far more important than family and friends just so we know if we are getting anywhere or we are on the right track. The two most important listeners are strangers and small children, if they dig what we are doing we know we are on the right track. The opinion of family and friends cannot be trusted lol, not can their attendance at live shows. In Utah I have noticed that some bands have the same crowd every time, I call it the family and friends network, they show up almost every time and in decent numbers and those bands get a false sense of what they are doing. However if some of those bands perform out of their safe zone area and those people cannot make the show, they are playing to crickets all of a sudden. Instead of trying to drag people around to club shows we have instead focused on playing shows where we will have a captive audience no matter what; fairs, festivals, and private parties, etc. We only play clubs when there is a special event involved like a birthday or a fund-raiser. Going to where the people are is our primary focus, rather than trying to entice whatever following we may have to go spend their money at a bar, which we cannot even afford to do ourselves, has been a far better plan and works well for us. I would rather play to 100-1000 people six times a year than play to 10-50 people twenty four times a year. I say chase the crowds rather than try to draw a crowd, and if family and friends show up give them a great table or spot and a big hug, but don't take it any further than that or put any meaning behind if they show up or not.

 

[kinleyd]

Hee hee hee!

 

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

oooh i like that. chase the crowds. although we are not really a fair/festival kind of band (at least not all ages) with our songs like "fuck you, I'm on a bike".

again, I dont expect them at every show, but not coming literally once is a tad insulting. of course you shouldnt rely on them...its all about making strangers give a crap.

 

[el_bastardo]

..its all about making strangers give a crap.

That's the way it should be if you actually want "fans". You want strangers to go out of their way and drop their money to see you. When you can achieve that, you're doing something good. Your girlfriends and bros getting in on the guest list does not count for anything.

 

[NateSLC]

Well that is a damn good song title lol! Maybe you could dial it down too "Screw you, I am on a Bike". Lots of very famous comedians still had to do talk shows like Carson where they couldn't give the full uncensored routine, but it was still damn good. If Richard Pryor can do a PG network show to get himself out there, it should be a good historical lesson. I didn't ever play big crowds when I was in a hard rock band, it was not until I started a Blues Rock band that things turned around. Sometimes its scaling down the routine, sometimes its changing the routine I guess, but I just do my best to pay attention and see what works. My current record is one million mistakes, and just a few victories lol.

 

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

That really wont happen...we are what we are. I think we'd rather fail doing what we love than water it down to have more mass appeal. It is what it is. Maybe we build a following, maybe we get tired of it in two years.

 

[el_bastardo]

That really wont happen...we are what we are. I think we'd rather fail doing what we love than water it down to have more mass appeal. It is what it is. Maybe we build a following, maybe we get tired of it in two years.

Atta boy. Stand your ground.

 

[Ghostman]

Not friends, not family, not acquaintences, not strangers, not anyone. But I sell out the Bedroom venue every time I plug in.

 

[Derek S]

Not friends, not family, not acquaintences, not strangers, not anyone. But I sell out the Bedroom venue every time I plug in.

I like saying "I have a face for studio, NOT STAGE!"

 

[Biddlin]

As some of you know, I am in a two piece rock comedy band. We are at that bottom of the barrel local level where no one knows you or cares that you exist. Worst is that it's impossible or nearly so to even get people we KNOW (friends, colleagues) to come. Like even just once. I get that you're not gonna come every time, but just the once would be appreciated.

"Maybe your band sucks."

No, I daresay we put on an entertaining show, the songs are catchy, and we play 'em good.

You guys in original bands experienced the same?

Many of the places I play, I wouldn't let my family patronize. There is a place in Oakland where my son used to bring his partners on the college wrestling team when he came to see dad play. My wife used to come out to the nicer joints and my kids show up once in awhile. A brother is frequently the leader and singer in my musical ventures. I have a loyal following of friends from my old day job and student days, so I can at least raise a minyan at the bar.

 

[flyinguitars]

I played most of my adult life 3-4 nights a week, so there have been lots of times that friends and family have been out to see the band. My wife was always sporadic about coming out to see me. She came out more when we were younger.
When I hit my 30s I worked during the day as a scientist at a large pharma co. I still played thurs/fri/sat nights and there was a lot of coworkers who were mid 20s to 40s age range. There was a big crew in R&D and Validation that were total nerds with nothing to do.. lol..During that time in my life, a lot of coworkers came out and followed the band at that time. During that period, I was in a cover/original rock band and we were playing all of the good clubs in the phila/jersey/Delaware area. Live music was huge here and we saw regular crowds of 500, 1000, 1500 people depending on the venue...some of the outdoor clubs around the city would hit 3000+ on a good night, so friends would come out a hang with us and have a good time.

Now that I'm older, I have a jam band that consists of my old friends who play...we only play 1 or 2 small pub style local places. We don't play that often, so it is mostly friends and family and always turns into a big jam and party of about 100 people. They are some of the most fun gigs. A lot of my friends play so people are always sitting in throughout the night.

My other current band is a tribute and we travel so we only see friends and family once or twice a year when we play locally.

 

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

We are finding that getting better crowds/gigs seems to be (for us) about hooking up with similar but more well-known bands and getting exposed to their fans.

 

[el_bastardo]

We are finding that getting better crowds/gigs seems to be (for us) about hooking up with similar but more well-known bands and getting exposed to their fans.

Totally normal.

 

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

Yeah but we're like JUST NOW kinda getting good at doing that. Wish we'd known all this a year, year and a half ago.

 

[EndGame00]

Having two kids who does not appreciate contemporay gospel music , I do get a complimentary "no offense to you dad, but your band sucks"...

 

[Denise]

Yes, my son dances when I practice my scales.

 

[Dogs of Doom]

friends?

family?

who has time for that?

In all reality, ever heard that old adage about mixing business w/ pleasure? or doing business w/ family & friends?

 

[MarshallDog]

I only play a couple short gigs a year so many do show up because there arent to many chances to attend...lol! Now when I say we are playing, most of them show up. That fixed that problem!! N

 

[AAHIHaveNoIdeaWhatImDoing]

Damned if you do, damned if you don't, eh?